“Why does she do that”?

“Why does she feel compelled to share her thoughts all over social media and through blogging?” I’d imagine y’all have pondered this at least once before. From my family and friends, to the people I went to school with, to parents I have known for years, and to the complete strangers on the other side of the screen, “why”?

At first it started out as an Instagram account solely for me to share my practice with some cute quotes as the caption. As I under went personal growth and transformations, my need to express myself further grew. It may be no surprise, but I have always been a highly emotional person. However I suppressed my emotions for far to long. As a child I was taught that being emotional was a weak characteristic. As most children do, I acted as I was “supposed” too. Then throughout high school my bottled up emotions began to over flow. There were many repercussions due to the years worth of mental neglect. This is around the time my anxiety sky rocketed, the panic attacks were all to normal, and I went on multiple bingers which consisted of different drugs and alcohol. I was lost in trauma, self pity and doubt. There is no way in hell I would have posted half of the things I have six plus years ago. The fear of judgement was way to powerful back then. Fast forward to today and the “I don’t give a fuck” attitude is becoming a new staple in my life.

Shortly after having a consistent practice my whole being went under a metamorphosis, as cliche as it sounds, it’s true. The once depressed and overly anxious young lady began transforming into an empowered, strong willed, and vibrant woman. The urge to write it all down became increasingly stronger.

Some of you may have noticed this, others may have not. Until recently I never talked about my story all that much. More so just my practice and how it helped me find myself. It was always a vague description of my life. Yet here we are and I have grown comfortable sharing my past and present with whomever wants to see it. Writing is a another form of therapy. I can put it all on paper, my abusive childhood, mental illnesses, transformation, etc, etc. It is not to get a rise out of people or for pity.

If you take away anything from all of this. Please know that you can heal, you can become whole, and you can be happy. After all, you deserve it. We all do.

 

Love & Light

The Hippie Yogi Mama

 

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